The BIG U/S!

No, we did not find out the sex.  Now that the big question is answered, on to the fun stuff!  My teeny leetle Baby J:

"Shut it people, I'm trying to sleep!"

How ridiculously cute is that?  Okay, I'm biased.  The tech gave me an abundance of pictures, as well as a video, but I will not overwhelm you with more cuteness than one person should ever have to endure, mmkay?

Anyway, the important stuff... everything was measuring perfectly.  I was told that my baby has a perfectly shaped head, a strong heart, and nice spinal cord.  The face looked great, as did all of the other organs and apendages we were able to see.  The tech did get a look at the goods, but the answer to the big questions will not be revealed until June 25th-ish.  Well, that is, unless we get uber-curious and must know.  The answer lies in a sealed envelope in the doc's office.

In other news, my doctor also referred me to a urologist because I'm still have some pain in my kidneys.  Apparently, I have some sort of malfunction that can happen when you are pregnant.  Please do not ask me to repeat the name because I have no clue what it is called... hyrdo-narsomethinoranother, whatever.  It seems to be worse on the right side, which is funny because most of my pain is on the left side.  I likened it to being kicked in the kidney by a steel-toed boot.  No fun.

But you know what is fun?  My precious doctor suggested that I relieve some of the pain by having a prenatal massage.  I love that woman.  J is all for it.  He said whatever keeps his baby (the child, not me) fat and happy.  Yes, he said fat.  I assume that is not in reference to the weight that I have gained.  The nurse said that overall I had only gained 11 lbs so far.  I'm not sure how they chose their baseline, but methinks their calculations are off.  However, 11 seems acceptable, so we will go with that. 

Maybe J praised the idea of the massage because I had just shot him a dirty look for calling me his "cute little buddha."  Hmmm....

Wow...

5 weeks and 18 weeks

Okay, so this is the first time I have looked at these pics side-by-side.  One thing is for certain, my ass is huge.  Where the hell did that thing come from?  Yikes.  I absolutely can not wait until my next appointment in two weeks to find out exactly how much my ass I weigh.  And to see the baby, of course.

17 weeks today!

For some reason, I am always extremely nervous about doctor's appointments.  The one Wednesday was no different, but as always she said everything looked great!  The baby's heartbeat was 157.  The only odd thing was that she said I had lost 3 pounds.  Umexcusemedowhatnow???  How is that?  My scales were a total of SIX pounds off, on the heavier side, than hers!  I guess I should go by what hers said?

So now she is concerned, J is concerned, my mother is concerned... and I am befuddled.  How in the world did that happen?  And what is wrong with my scales, as they are still six pounds higher than hers???  Color me confused.

Anyway, my lovely family is now stuffing food down my throat and constantly checking up on me.  Fun times, I tell ya.    Well, it has been a while, so here is a new quiz for your entertainment:

• How far along?: 17 weeks.

• Total weight gain: According to the doc’s scales, I have gained 8 pounds; however, according to my scales I have gained 15. Go figure.

• How big is baby?: the size of an onion

• Maternity clothes?: Still just my Bella Band.

• Stretch marks?: Nope.

• Sleep?: Hasn’t been as great as it once was. Some nights I am practically in a coma, other nights I don’t get much sleep at all.

• Best moment this week?: Hearing the baby’s hearbeat!

• Movement?: Ummm, not sure? I think maybe I’m feeling some flutters, but nothing definite.

• Food cravings?: Cheesecake and orange juice (which I have always despised).

• Gender?: I’m still thinking boy, but I’m not as confident as I once was.

• Labor signs?: Nope.

• Belly button in or out?: In, but it oddly seems to be expanding. Twilight zone shizz.

• What I miss: I still miss my red wine.


• What I'm looking forward to: The big u/s on Feb. 10th! Although, I think we have decided to NOT find out the sex.


• Milestone: Not sure if it is a milestone, but even my jeans won’t button now. The Bella Band is needed daily… unless I choose not to get out of my pajamas one day, but of course I would never do that :)

• Weekly Wisdom: Let people take care of you. Not that you need it or are taking advantage, but give yourself a break every once in a while.

I'm back from my "Lost" induced hibernation

Well, hello there!  Yes, I've been MIA for awhile.  Sorry about that.  I have no excuse for not posting anything over my four day break, unless you count lounging on the couch ALL.DAY.LONG watching a marathon of Season 1 of Lost an excuse. 

My NYE was uneventful... I mean, come on, how rowdy is a pregnant woman going to get?  The most exciting thing I did that day was get a new Blackberry (Curve 2, love it).

So here I am now, back at work-- getting used to my new role as bitch assistant.  I keep reminding myself that it is only temporary.  Bigger and better things are coming my way!  Hopefully.

In baby news, because that is probably way more interesting than anything else I've said thus far, I am actually getting a belly now!  It popped out practically overnight.  I kept wondering what these chicas on the Bump meant when they said they could feel their uterus... sounds weird, right?  My stomach used to be flat/concave when I would lay down and now it still sticks out.  Wow, what a difference a few days make. 

Please note, my ass has also joined the party.  Hardly any of my pants fit.  Ugh.  And although my eating habits have not changed, I am up a grand total of 14 lbs at 15 weeks 5 days. 

I think I'll end on that note because nothing else I can say would top that.

I hate water

Really?  Water?  The only way I can stomach it is if I am eating something.  Good thing, or actually not so much, that I am eating ALL THE TIME.  I am so hungry. 

Yesterday, I had my first go round with the queasiness.  That is no fun.  And the only thing that cures it?  You got it, eating. 

So let's see...  total weight gain to date is a whopping 8 pounds.  That is insane.  How in the name of all that is holy is that even possible?!  Sorry if I'm a bit obssessed with weight, but... well, I'm obssessed with weight.  Always have been.  Yeah, I know, I need to just get over that now.

And on a totally unrelated note, I'm getting the H1N1 shot tomorrow.  Woohoo.  Hey, at least I'm not working tomorrow.  Yay!  Hope you all have a great weekend!

This is not good.

As I sit here at my desk today, I look like I should be reading cheesy lines for my starring role in a porn flick.  Yes, it is that bad.  I have on a white button down shirt and the buttons are about to pop off.  I am trying desperately to hide them with my scarf, to no avail.  How did I not notice this before I left my house?  Probably because I was too busy trying to gather everything edible in the house to take for lunch.  By the way, lunch now lasts approximately eight hours.

Ah, the joys of pregnancy.  Is it okay to say that even though I'm not even seven weeks yet?  Probably not.  Here is a run down of my "ailments" thus far:

• Bouts of dizziness:  The kind that makes you feel like you had one too many lemon drop shots and the room is spinning.
• Excessive hunger:  Saturday night I was hungrier that I had ever been in my life.  No shit.  I was so hungry that it hurt.
• Desperate need for sleep:  I am tired all.the.time.  Not just the lay your head down for five minutes kind of tired.  I'm talking deep sleep coma kind of tired.
• Weight gain:  A touchy subject, I know.  I have always been pretty thin.  It has really done a number on my mental state to see that I've gained seven pounds so far.  Yes, you read that correctly, seven pounds.  Blame it on whatever you wish, but I've never weighed this much in my life and it is a hell of a shock to see on the scale.

So far, only a little bit of nausea and fleeting at that.  I guess I consider myself lucky, but I've got a long road a head of me!  Please keep your fingers crossed that these buttons don't decide to give in to the stress right in the middle of my finance presentation tonight.  And if they do, please God let my body respond in kind by allowing me to just pass out or die of embarassment right there on the spot.

Apparently, I am not Spiderman

Everything is annoying me lately.  J got out of the shower last night and the smell of the soap annoyed me (because it didn't smell right).  I made shrimp creole last night and it was gritty because J didn't get all of the veins out.  Oh come on, you would be annoyed by that, too.  And now I am annoyed because I am supposed to be going out with my friends tonight.  It isn't that I don't want to go, but because I'm in such a pissy mood and I feel gross.

Part of the reason I feel gross is because of the weight gain.  Yep, you read correctly.  I will be six weeks on Friday and I have already put on 3 lbs.  It isn't the number that bothers me, just the fact that I feel a bit pudgy and my clothes are a little tighter.  This feeling is further exaggerated by the following situation, which occured yesterday:

I was having a nice lunch with my co-workers when someone came into the office.  Nice person that I am, I let everyone else eat and I went to help the person.  Five minutes later, lunch resumed.  After lunch, the woman that I work most closely with (and a pretty good friend) said that another one of the women asked her if I was pregnant.  She literally waited until I walked out of the room and asked IN FRONT OF EVERYONE ELSE.  Two things piss me off about this: 1. She purposefully waited until I left the room.  2.  She didn't pull anyone to the side, she put it out there for everyone to hear.  This could affect my job, not to mention my sanity.

I have always been on the lean side and realize that I've put on a few pounds.  But seriously, it isn't that noticable.  So I have no clue what led her to this conclusion.  I really want to tell her IN FRONT OF EVERYONE to stop acting like a high school gossip queen and mind her own fucking business, but I'm not ready to out myself to everyone yet for the aforementioned reasons.  Alas, I shall sit back and stew over it.  My time will come.

Anyway, all of that aside.  I'm sitting at my desk trying to figure out what to do about tonight.  Maybe I can go buy a cheap and more comfortable outfit and still go tonight?  Then, what to do about my husband?  I can't tell him not to use soap.  I can't make him pay more attention to what he is doing.  I give up!  He told me that I am pregnant and that I do not have spidey-senses and that I need to get over it.  Boy, it is going to be a loooonnng eight more months for him!